Is monogamy making us miserable?
i have 2 main issues with this article:
1. in my opinion, lying/omitting is never a good thing, regardless of the type of relationship that you’re in. i’m all for forgiveness and realism, but it’s not real if you’re choosing to lie/omit to your partner(s), nor is it an especially forgivable act when one breaks trust with their partner(s). honesty is NOT for losers, it’s for those who have the ability to be real with the ones they love and not be hurtful for their own gains. not telling the truth is both the “safer”-for-now and more cowardly thing to do. i always like to give the example of trying to explain how your partner(s) contracted an STI when they have been truthful with you about whom they have or have not been sleeping with.
2. it’s one thing to “become more relaxed about fidelity” (which i agree needs to and should happen), but what this article really seems to be trying to persuade readers to do is to blame monogamy for people’s infidelities. this is wrong. monogamy works for some and doesn’t for others. what’s to blame is the institution of monogamy. people buy into the idea that monogamy means faithfulness and loyalty and forever and yadda yadda yadda. people need to start being truthful with one another. monogamy doesn’t mean that someone will be your one and only for however long the relationship lasts. rather than assume monogamy, people need to start having truthful conversations about their feelings of what monogamy means to them and wether or not their definition can work well with their partners(‘) definition.
